Das aufsteigende Gewitter in deinem Kopf
welches sich immer weiter ausbreitet
jeden Bereich des Denkens einnimmt
alles Schöne in Depressionen ertränkt

Die Taubheit deiner Gefühle
die dich so fühlen lässt
als hättest du nie geliebt
nie gehasst
alles läuft mechanisch
wie von Zauberhand
nur ohne Zauber

Die Einsamkeit der Seele
du hast das Zuhause verloren
das kein Zuhause war
fühlst dich inzwei geteilt
obwohl du doch ein Ganzes bist
du merkst
dass etwas fehlt
das Alles und doch Nichts war

Das aufsteigende Gewitter in deinem Kopf
welches sich immer weiter ausbreitet


As I got to know him and went from one party to another – just to see him for a few hours – I remember a house being destroyed in the same street a friend of ours lived since it was too old and fragile. I remember driving alongside this ruine by bus before reaching our friend’s house and everytime I saw it in these couple of years I recognized how heavy the demolation has actually been.

The more parties I went to the more destruction I noticed. The last time I visited one of these parties the house did not exist anymore. Only a fundamental of dust. Nothing else.

The days and months without this toxic relationship passed and this summer -two years afterwards- I walked alongside the building site and noticed that they started to build an new house. A new one. A brighter one, a modern one, a greater one. It will need a lot of time; it affords lots of patience – but one day this house will be built finished, completed and new. No traces of the old one, neither dust nor destruction.

It is the same thing with me -with all of us – and my personality and self-esteem. Sometimes we have to be patient, strong – we need to show bravery and strenght. Things might happen to all of us. Things that will break your heart, leave your mind helpless, your soul torn apart, things that will make you bursting into tears in the middle of the night. Things which seem to be so unbearable that you ask yourself whether you willl survive it at all

You will. Right after trying, healing and keeping forward, you will be the best version of yourself ever. You will be the bravest one, the strongest one and the most beautiful version of yourself. A wiser person, a smarter person. One day – I promise – you will find yourself again. It is all about your willing to heal – and I am sure you are full of it.